me. last saturday. I’ve been sneaking peeks at this pic on VK’s blog for a few days now: at first when I saw it, my heart was in my mouth and I wanted to not eat for a month after noting the folds of flesh - folds which I’m usually careful to hide when I take my self-shots, by posing my body in ways where they don’t show.
Let me be clear: I never judge anyone else’s body so harshly. I can look at another woman much larger than myself, with grand ripples and bulges of flesh, and see nothing but beauty and sensuality, as long as she has a pretty non-duck face. But when it comes to my own body it’s terribly hard to shift my perspective. Curves, we are told, are beautiful and feminine. But what people usually mean are curves in two places only: boobs and butt. Any ripples or crevasses or roundness in that space between is abject. So I still struggle with my own body positivity. But seeing the caption Vk wrote for this image, and seeing that there were no horrible comments on the image made me slowly come around. I’ve been returning to it, trying to re-see it through VK’s eyes as ‘beguiling softness’, and trying to remember how I see other women’s bodies that look this way or more so. I think I’m OK with it now. I think I can tentatively say ‘yes, this is beautiful’.